| On the carpet by the door... |
[Jul. 16th, 2008|08:57 am] |
Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel have broken up.
Matt and Ben must be so happy not to have to hide their feelings any longer. |
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| Zombie Strippers * |
[Jul. 4th, 2008|11:47 am] |
It has an awesome title, Robert Englund, and Jenna Jameson. It would have to be at least amusing, right?
Wrong.
Of the 95 minutes running time, I'd say maybe 7 minutes were not totally wasted, and most of that was admiring the decent-for-the-no-budget zombie makeup. Given the number of boobs in the film, there was only one set I found remotely attractive, the rest being beachalls on a xylophone. They were trying for so-bad-it's-good, but they missed. It's just bad.
I don't even *blame* the Jay Lee (writer, director, editor), really. It's HARD to make a movie. Getting through the process at all is a stunning accomplishment. By the time you're at the end of it, sitting in front of the computer with the 2 people who will still talk to you, trying to decide what to keep in and what to cut, how to make the scene work when your lead 'actress' couldn't manage to get through her lines without looking off camera where you'd written them on part of a cardbord box, and it's 3am, everything seems hilarious. You'll convince yourself something works just to get it done. But it doesn't work, and sometimes, despite all your effort, it will NEVER work. The merciful thing to do is delete all the footage and try something new. Maybe auto sales. But damnit, you've put hours, days, weeks, maybe months into this, and it is GONNA GET BURNED ON A DVD AND SEEN BY SOMEONE!
You have to make *something* before you make something good. This is Jay Lee's something.
That doesn't mean you should watch it.
* yes, I typo'd on the title. It's fixed now. |
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| I <3 blisters |
[Jun. 28th, 2008|10:30 pm] |
my hand is finally starting to peel, right where I got the blisters.
the funny part: the pink new skin being revealed is in the shape of a perfect heart. really. I'll post a picture if I have the chance.
Also, no time for a full review right now but:
Wanted
------
very very stupid. very very 'splodey.
almost worth seeing because the 'splodey is very well done. also, angelina jolie is in full 'pose and pooch lips' mode. that's more or less all she does. if that's your thing, by all means, this is your movie. |
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| 2nd degree, baby |
[Jun. 24th, 2008|11:31 pm] |
Saturday, when it was something like 102, we decided to make a roast. well, not really. we'd bought it earlier in the week before it was a zillion degrees, and HAD to make it. so rather than heat up the oven, I made it on the grill in a roasting pan.
good: roast came out excellent. yay electronic mean thermometers!
bad: tripped as I was bringing it in, dumping it on the carpet and spilling 3-400 degree sizzling hot fat all over the back of my right hand.
I was in unbelievable pain all saturday evening, and eventually fell asleep with my hand still wrapped in in a towel with icepacks. Sunday was better but with blisters. Monday was better but with even BIGGER blisters.
Monday night I pinpricked them, as they were starting to interfere with my moving my hand around. They feel better today, though the skin from my knockes to a couple inches past my wrist is blotchy red and feels tight, despite the twice daily coating of neosporin and the application of moisterizer.
Let's NOT do this again, hm? |
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| under the wire |
[Jun. 16th, 2008|05:43 pm] |
Seen in the parkinglot of my office:
A mazda miata with the following license plate:
UH WTF
It has to be a few years old, or they'd never have let it through.
I'm betting it gets revoked inside 2 years. |
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| Let me show you my obsolescence |
[May. 30th, 2008|11:18 pm] |
My obsolescence
Let me show you it. |
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| Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull |
[May. 19th, 2008|10:22 am] |
I went in to this with a slight sense of dread. A 20 year old beloved franchise controlled by George Lucas. I wonder if I should be expecting a serious slash and burn of my childhood? Perhaps with the addition of a pidgin talking comic relief native guide, or a cute little kid?
Thankfully, my worst fears were not realized. Sure, there were a smattering of 'Boy, Harrison Ford is old.' jokes, but largely, they were part of the simple acknowledgement that time has simply passed for all concerned. Indy's old companion Marcus is gone, Henry Jones Sr. is gone. The Nazi menace has been replaced by the Red menace and 50's McCarthyism is in full swing. But all this setup, and a bunch of ancient mayan ledgends about a crystal skull, is just set-up for banter and action sequences, which are fun, well paced, and played straight for maximum effect. There's a slight sense of missing potential, somehow, but that is, I think, mostly nostalgic remembrances of the first movie from my teenage brain. And, uncharacteristically, Cate Blanchett as the nominal villian is dull. She has the look and the presence, but her Rooskie accent slides all over the place and her performance is oddly restrained. She nibbles on the scenery when she should be chewing it off in big hunks.
But even so, it's a fun adventure, and a worthy addition. |
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| CA supreme ct overturns gay marriage ban |
[May. 15th, 2008|10:55 am] |
On the one hand, good. I am for this.
On the other, nice timing. Let's just HAND the election to the crazies. They were lukewarm on McCain. This is just the sort of stupid, base-red-meat issue he needs to toss around.
"activist judges!"
"Think of the children!"
"Strict constructionist!"
"Constitutional Amendment!"
Sorry. in a pissy mood. This should be good news. Instead, I'm just disgusted. Because we can LOSE for this, and if it's one thing the dems are good at, it's snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. |
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| ASCII art |
[May. 9th, 2008|01:40 pm] |
so, there's boobs:
(.)(.)
or
(o)(o)
bigger boobs:
( o )( o )
Really big boobs:
( O )( O )
really big boobs with nipple clamps
( [o] )( [o] )
really big boobs with really pinchy clamps
( >8< )( >8< )
pierced
( -O- )( -O- )
Yes, I DO have more important things to do. |
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| new chair |
[Apr. 23rd, 2008|12:53 pm] |
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Well, the ergo dept is seriously lacking 'round here. No monitor swing arms. Still waiting for a new mouse and a split keyboard. But they FINALLY got me a non-Aeron chair. I don't get my happy-butt-making Humanscale, but at least this one has a padded seat that isn't digging into my underpadded ass and the backs of my thighs. |
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| last night's movie |
[Apr. 17th, 2008|03:36 pm] |
"I gave her my heart. She gave me a pen."
daughter comment: "Oh, THIS is where the boom-box thing comes from! Ok. I get it now."
additional daughter comment: "Is she in EVERYTHING he's in?" |
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| here we go... |
[Apr. 13th, 2008|10:55 pm] |
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I should be asleep already, but we were watching Heathers. |
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| Fart Jokes |
[Apr. 8th, 2008|10:00 pm] |
I start monday at dreamworks.
Celebrity voices, setup , punchline, setup, punchline.
Also, Shrek 3 made $400+ million. 10-25% bonus per year depending on box office reciepts.
1.25 hour commute to Redwood City, though. I'll need to get the brakes done.
still, it's a nice facility, free breakfast and lunch, gym, showers, classes, etc. I think I'll be much more comfortable there than I was at WildBrain. I admit it. I like the corporate perks. And yeah, the movies will not be as strong, cinematically, as pixar, but damn, these guys know how to make $$$.
also, 3 year deal. Stability is very comforting. |
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| Ok, ok ok ok... |
[Apr. 3rd, 2008|04:38 pm] |
Fine. fine fine fine. here. This is just because I'm reading Stephen Pinker, isn't it?
Age: 39
Where did you grow up: Chicago and north suburbs
WHAT DO YOU CALL:
1. A body of water, smaller than a river, contained within relatively narrow banks.
creek (rhymes with 'peak')
2. What the thing you push around the grocery store is called.
grocery cart
3. A metal container to carry a meal in.
lunchbox
4. The thing that you cook bacon and eggs in.
frying pan
5. The piece of furniture that seats three people.
couch
6. The device on the outside of the house that carries rain off the roof.
gutter
7. The covered area outside a house where people sit in the evening.
porch
8. Carbonated, sweetened, non-alcoholic beverages.
pop, though I have since migrated to 'soda'
9. A flat, round breakfast food served with syrup.
pancake
10. A long sandwich designed to be a whole meal in itself.
sub
11. The piece of clothing worn by men at the beach.
bathing suit
12. Shoes worn for sports.
gym shoes
13. Putting a room in order.
cleaning (alternately: something someone else does)
14. A flying insect that glows in the dark.
lightning bug
15. The little insect that curls up into a ball.
roly-poly, occasionally 'pillbug'
16.The children's playground equipment where one kid sits on one side and goes up while the other sits on the other side and goes down.
see-saw (teeter-totter sometimes. I recall both)
17. How do you eat your pizza?
thin slices can be eaten with hands unless they're too hot.
the little square-cut slices are also eaten with hands (again, forks are acceptable when
it's still too hot to hold)
Pan or stuffed slices demand utensils, at least 'til the cheese is somewhat solidified.
18. What's it called when private citizens put up signs and sell their used stuff?
garage sale
19. What's the evening meal?
dinner. only hicks ate 'supper'
20. The thing under a house where the furnace and perhaps a rec room are?
basement
21. What do you call the thing that you can get water out of to drink in public places?
water fountain or drinking fountain. I default to the first. |
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| Bank Job |
[Apr. 1st, 2008|06:06 pm] |
Just bad. Not awsome fun doomsday bad. Just bad. It's an heist movie in which everything is shot terribly stylishly and dramatically, even with lots of pointless timeline jumping, in a not-entirely effective effort to explain a meandering, pointlessly twisty plot in which you care about no one. The heist isn't that big a deal, the double-crosses can be seen coming WAY up the road, and where even low-rent Hard-Guy Jason Stratham can't rescue the slog with a way too little action, WAY too late.
I should've seen Doomsday again. At least that had Frankie Goes to Hollywood in the soundtrack. |
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| RIP ACC |
[Mar. 18th, 2008|10:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sad | ] |
Arthur C Clarke has died in his home in Sri Lanka after developing breathing problems. He was 90.
I know a filmmaker who was in regular correspondence w/ Clarke, and was working on a film based on Clarke's story, Maelstrom II. It was, last I checked, nearly complete, with Clarke approving modifications in the script in order that it be turned into an educational primer on orbital mechanics. If you know the story, this makes perfect sense.
His work was genuinely visionary. The Sentinal (and 2001), The Nine Billion Names of God, and especially Childhood's End have probably been copied/paid homage to/blatantly ripped off/inspired thousands of other stories. Even his later work, which I confess I was not a great fan as compared to his earlier pieces, was still full of fantastic forward-thinking and a marked plausibility with respect to both technology and the social implications of it.
Someone on boingboing suggested his ashes be embedded in an adamantite monolith and buried on the mood in the Tycho crater.
I would absolutely donate $50 to that effort. |
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